Peaches’ Personal Spice Scale

One of the questions I get asked most often — usually whispered over a glass of wine — is: “But how spicy is it, really?”

Because let’s be honest, darling, there’s a world of difference between a closed-door kiss and a 400-page fae breeding kink marathon. Both valid, both delicious — but not remotely the same.

So, in the name of clarity (and a little mischief), allow me to introduce you to Peaches’ Spice Scale. Think of it as your roadmap through the steamy stacks: part book club, part sex-ed, all sass.

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🌶️ 0 Chillis — Mild & Sweet

Hand-holding, longing glances, maybe a fade-to-black kiss if you’re lucky. These books keep it wholesome. Perfect for when you’re curled up with a hot chocolate and want zero chance of your flatmate asking why you’re blushing.

🌶️ 1 Chilli — Flirty & Closed Door

There’s sexual tension, there’s kissing, maybe even a hint of clothes coming off… and then bam, the door closes. Everything happens off-page. Your imagination is doing the heavy lifting. Best for when you want romance with a little thrill but no explicit detail.

🌶️🌶️ 2 Chillies — A Gentle Simmer

Ah, the slow burn with payoff. There are on-page sex scenes, but they’re tame, tender, and written to tug the heartstrings as much as anywhere else. Think missionary with soft lighting and plenty of “I love yous.”

🌶️🌶️🌶️ 3 Chillies — Properly Saucy

This is where the blush factor rises. Multiple on-page sex scenes, more detail, a bit of dirty talk, maybe some light kink. You’ll find yourself reading faster on the train and hiding your Kindle screen with your scarf.

🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 4 Chillies — Fan Me, Darling

Explicit. Frequent. Imaginative. The kind of scenes that make you immediately text your group chat: “Page 247 — you’ll know it when you get there.” Toys, power play, creative positions… let’s just say you’re not skipping anything.

🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 5 Chillies — Call the Fire Brigade

Unhinged. Glorious. Zero chill. This is the “my Kindle overheated” level. Expect breeding kinks, group play, bondage, bite marks, the works. If it can be written, it’s probably here. Definitely not safe for the family holiday.

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Why the Scale Matters 💃

Because spice is subjective, and knowing what you’re in the mood for helps you pick your pleasure. Maybe today you want a gentle simmer, tomorrow you’re ready for the fire brigade. Both are valid. Both are empowering.

And here’s the fun bit: from now on, whenever I recommend books (or toys to pair them with 👀), I’ll give you my Chilli Rating. That way you’ll know exactly what you’re signing up for before you dive in.

So tell me — what’s your sweet spot on the scale? Are you a 2-Chilli romantic, a 3-Chilli thrill-seeker, or living permanently at a 5-Chilli inferno?

Slide into Ask Peaches with your dilemmas and reading requests — and don’t forget to let me know your ideal spice level. Because darling, life’s too short for lukewarm books.