Ask Peaches: How do you manage a smut hangover?

New here, darling? This post is part of a series called ‘Ask Peaches’ where I answer the delicious, burning questions you have about smut, sex and anything spicy inbetween. Read this for more context or send your own juicy musings straight to me at peaches@ladieswholit.co.uk Always anonymous, always answered in good faith and good fun. Take what you love and leave anything you don’t.

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Dear Peaches,

I’m not sure if this is just a ‘me’ thing, but sometimes when I finish an especially spicy romance or series, I feel a little down? It’s only really when I read smut - even sad stories don’t seem to affect me in the same way. It feels amazing in the moment and I could just keep reading, but work, social life and bank balance are a thing (boo).

What’s happening and how do I handle it?

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It sounds like you could be experiencing something similar to a ‘drop’, darling. You may have even come across the term in your c-literary adventures, especially if you’ve read anything like the Salacious Players’ Club series (or the Fifty Shades trilogy.)

While I’m a keen experimenter, I’m no scientist. But ‘sub drop’ is a well documented phenomenon within the kink community, and there’s solid research behind the biological processes involved in kink scenes. If you’re curious (and if you’re part of LWcL, you definitely are) you can dig into the science yourself. To help answer your question here, let’s focus on the important bits.

Dopamine is the chemical our brains release in response to pleasure. It tells us something is good, and to keep doing that thing or go find more of it. If we’re talking sexual pleasure, we also have to talk about endorphins - the neurochemical that gives us a sense of relaxation and euphoria.

So, when you feel that familiar fire licking through your body, face-first in some extra spicy smut? You’ve got both these neurochemicals coursing through you.

If your current read is frequent and heavy on delicious details, you might be in this heightened state of pleasure for a prolonged period. When you stop reading (and touching, if you’ve really seized the moment), the pleasure stops, and the dopamine and endorphins decline. It’s not dissimilar to a sugar crash.

Still feeling it a day or two after? You might also be feeling a type of loss, specifically the experience of being that locked into the scenes, like a ‘flow state’, according to some scientists.

It’s all well and good understanding why smut hangovers might happen, but what do you do about it? 

When life demands we step out of our feral fantasies, you can treat it a little like post-scene aftercare in kink. No dom required (unless you have one handy.)

• Wrap yourself in something soft. Your nervous system just went through it, and it deserves a comforting hug.
• Run a bath or take a long ‘everything’ shower. Warm water, soft lighting and gentle physical touch are super therapeutic.
• Journal it. Which parts really had you breathless, wanting more? Writing it down might help process the experience and ground you back in reality.
• Talk about it. Post in the Smut Girlies group - spill the tea to your fellow unhinged readers. Shared obsession is its own aftercare.
• Consider a little smut break. Don't immediately chase the feeling with another spicy read. Read something smut-free, and you'll enjoy the next one so much more for it.